Our History, Our Mother’s History and the Family Dance: How It Impacts Us Now

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Last week I watched In Utero, a fascinating documentary screened by Suburban Sandcastles. The documentary was based on how trauma experienced by the mother whilst pregnant or prior to pregnancy can inform the foetus’ experience of life, their development and their behaviour.

I found it amazing and I have written about this before, for Sunday Life. I specifically wrote about how my experience of recurrent miscarriage prior to my oldest daughter’s birth has affected her, and her world view. If you’re interested, you can read that article here.

So this is something that I’ve had first hand experience with, so for me it was amazing to hear of the scientific research that backs this up. It was no longer just a personal experience, it is something that has been backed up by research.

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The Morning Drum’s First Humble Beginnings Contribution: What Is That? By Anon

The story below has been sent to me by an anonymous contributor under the Humble Beginnings project on this blog. The idea is that people can send me their writing and I’ll publish it for them.

It can be published in their name, or as anonymous – for the shy ones. “What Is That?” is the first Humble Beginnings contribution, and talks about some uncomfortable topics around sexuality, parenting and misogyny. I hope you enjoy this thought-provoking piece. 

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The Stuff of Life: Balancing the Good With the Bad

Hell yeah

I’ve written before about how I write Morning Pages and how the act of writing out what I am thankful for has made a huge difference to my wellbeing. You know, sometimes you just wake up in a funk. My husband calls it waking up ‘with a bag on’ – meaning you feel like you’ve got a bag over your head. A little cryptic, but I think it describes how I sometimes feel.

On those days, this is when I benefit most from writing out my Morning Pages, but in particular, writing down the three things that I am thankful for. I’m not going down that path of banging on about practicing gratitude. It’s a bit over-talked I think, but I guess it’s because it works. It really can improve your outlook on life.  [Read more…]

My Morning Routine – In Real Life (this is a ‘no aspirational high-achievers’ zone).

Sunrise

We read so much about morning routines and not much of that has sunk in for me – except for a couple of things. Who are these cray-cray get up at 5am for a cup of calming herbal tea, bum on cushion for meditation, then out for energising run types? I’ve never met one.

But I am really interested in other people’s routines, what works, what doesn’t – and I’m just a bit of a sticky beak for details really. I get my fix of other peoples routines through Madeleine Dore’s ‘Extraordinary Routines’ blog. She writes about all sorts of people’s routines and rituals – perfect for a sticky-nose like me.

This week she wrote about Ken Done’s routine, for The Design Files. I just find these tiny details about other people really fascinating. Who would have thought that Ken Done swims every day? Or that he has a gnome in his studio that farts when the door closes? I love that I know this about him.

But, if the truth be known, I get a bit depressed about other people’s routines because mine is just all over the shop. I have actually implemented a couple of lovely things that have made a significant difference to the way my day is framed. I’m going to share my morning routine, warts and all, so you know for sure that I am not one of those ommm-ing while the sun rises.  [Read more…]

How to Learn Resilience If You’re A Grown Up

DSC_0236Resilience is a real buzz word at the moment, and for good reason. We all want our children to be resilient adults, so they need to learn how to be resilient while they’re growing up. It’s a tough one – we’re all doing the best we can, but some kids are just more resilient than others.

Personally, I have two kids on opposite ends of the resilience scale. One is very resilient, takes things on the chin, moves on. Another one of my children is what I’d describe as a highly sensitive child and this can be seen in how resilient she is. She’s learning, and I’m trying to guide her, but what if the grown up guiding the child is still learning how to be resilient?  [Read more…]